I have a hard time dreaming. Not in the "fall asleep and imagine" sort of way, but in the "look out into my future and long for and think of something BIG for me" sort of way. I don't know exactly what holds me back from dreaming. Maybe it's lack of imagination. Maybe it's cynicism. Maybe I have a hard time dreaming big because I have a hard time believing I can be used for something grand.
The dream doesn't even have to be large scale but for it to be "grand" but there's been this tiny little vision in the back of my mind of doing something specific on a rather large scale but honestly, I've been afraid to point blank ask God to allow me to have it.
I have been praying for God to allow me to dream big. The fact I even have a little tiny vision in mind is growth in and of itself but today... TODAY I read something that I know that I know that I know and that I'm able to apply to so many areas of my life. But today, today I felt this tug to apply it to my dream it made so much sense!
From the book Radical: Taking Back your Faith from he American Dream, author David Platt states,
"What if God in all his might is simply waiting to show his power in a people who turn their backs on a philosophy of life that exalts their supposed ability to do anything they want and who instead confess their desperate need from him? What if God in all his grace is radically committed to showing himself strong on behalf of a people who express their need for him so their lives might make much of him?"
I've spent too much time independently trying to figure out HOW I could achieve my dream, how can I do this and do that and get it all done as I work towards my goal. And the kicker?!? I haven't even asked God if I could have this dream much less depend on him for it!
What?!?
Let's pause for a moment...
Are to-do list, priorities, and goals bad?? Is it in and of itself bad to be a go-getter and try to get things done? Of course not!!
BUT (you knew there would be a but) But absent of a total and complete dependence on the source of all things, then those lists and goals and tasks become burdens. They become a list of things I WILL ultimately FAIL at in some way because I CANNOT get it all done by my own might. I just can't! And believe me I've tried!
I have a list and a vision and even awesome resources that I've spent WEEKS lately utilizing to try to make it all happen AND ITS NOT HAPPENING because ultimately I've been feeling defeated and deflated and honestly, overwhelmed.
This dream I asked God to be able to dream and now feel I've been subsequently given, has left me exhausted from the last several weeks of trying to achieve it on my own.
Our culture tells us that if we try hard enough and if we just believe in ourselves we can do great things. Eh, maybe we can do things but apart from the source of all things, we can only accomplish what we can accomplish. I won't speak for you, but I know that I'm rather finite in my abilities. AND when I'm busy accomplishing things by my own will and my own might, if I do actually accomplish anything, then I'm possibly the one who gets made much of. When in reality, it is HIM that deserves all credit and all glory. Mr. Platt goes further to say,
"It is the way of Christ. Instead of asserting ourselves, we crucify ourselves. Instead of imagining all the things we can accomplish, we ask God to do what only he can accomplish. Yes, we work, we plan, we organize, and we create, but we do it all while we fast, we pray, and while we constantly confess our need for the provision of God. Instead of dependence on ourselves, we express radical desperation for the power of his Spirit, and we trust that Jesus stands ready to give us everything we ask for so that he might make much of our Father in the world."
Apply that to the challenge groups I've been running lately. It's as if by accident I'm creating an environment that celebrates our own strength and our own willpower - as if we just buckle down enough, if we just will ourselves enough, then we can pass up that cupcake or whatever is tempting us at the moment and then we end up celebrating that person for being strong and following through!
Its sounds innocent enough but lately it just hasn't settle right with me... sure we have a certain amount of strength and there is definitely strength in numbers so we can and will accomplish some things on our own might...
But really, how much MORE can we accomplish when we stop "pulling ourselves up from our bootstraps" and "getting things done" and start recognizing that there is a God that "stands ready to allocate his power to all who are radically dependent on him and radically devoted to making much of him."
If you are a follower of Christ, I'd like to leave you with one more thought from Mr. Platt,
"The power of the one who raised Jesus from the dead is living in us, and as a result we have no need to muster up our own might. Our great need is to fall before an almighty Father day and night and to plead form him to show his radical power in and through us, enabling us to accomplish for his glory what we could never imagine in our own strength. And when we do this, we will discover that we were created for a purpose much greater than ourselves, the kind of purpose that can only be accomplished in the power of his Spirit."
Maybe this message truly is just for me today and that is ok. I'm cool with a God who cares enough to intimately speak to me about things I'm going through. But whatever you're facing, whatever you're dreaming of, whatever you're hoping to accomplish, I sincerely pray you come to complete and total radical dependence on the one who truly deserves to be made much of so that whatever it is you accomplish is for your good and HIS glory.
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10 (ESV)
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Now let's get on out there and revel in our weaknesses so we can radically depend on the ultimate source for our strength!
